More Gooder Than Best

More Gooder than “Best”

What are you good at? Are you the ““Best”” at something? Anything?  Only the truly lucky among us can easily say “that’s my thing, I’m the “Best”” with a straight face. Even those genetically gifted few, will likely have competition.

 

We can all claim to be the ““Best””, this is especially true if you like Animated movies where the message of, “We are all the “Best” at being ourselves” is drilled into your skull with each lyric. ““Best”” really happens in sports, our sanctioned gladiator contests of the modern world. Sports are about being the “Best” at the moment.

   

The idea of ““Best”” is something we are supposed to strive to attain….be the “Best” you can be.  We have honor rolls, awards, and the Olympics.  Generally I agree that it is good to try and excel at your given endeavor.  I like awards for folks who excel, I think it encourages others. However, there is a down side; you knew that right?…After all this is my blog. 

““Best”” is illusive, and has a price.

I generally look at life, skill, and focus as a continuum.  We all have a finite amount of each, and how we spend the time or allocate our mental resources, really determines our personalities.  Folks that are the ““Best”” are on the continuum as well, they have the desire, and innate ability to excel, and are super focused on one particular thing.

 I wonder:  If you use all of your energy to be the “Best” at one thing……can you be the good at anything else?

 

Americans seem to forget this.  We like to be shocked when our favorite professional athlete fails in the personality department (take your pick ), or when our professional actors turn out to be psychopaths (Cosby)…..models who are favored only for their looks are often found to be lacking as well ( I’m looking at you Naomi Campbell).  What about our captains of industry who are anal cavities (Trump). Which might only be surpassed by our TV news anchors, who are attractive people who are good at speaking…..but we expect them to be honest  (Sorry Tom Brokaw, and Sober, Poor Diane Sawyer, Genuine, plastic  Barbara Walters well timed tear, and Smart, moronic Weather channel guy who stands in the storm surge.)

In the academic world, the same is true.  I have encountered PhD’s who are literally rocket scientists who aren’t capable of a simple small talk conversation. I think what saves academia from the big scandals is that they don’t have the funds to truly misbehave and therefore fall into the realm of quirky, excepting the likes of the uni-bomber.

These are huge generalities…but the trend is there.

We expect our heroes who are the “Best” at their one thing, to be good at everything…..Just because you’re strong enough to play pro ball doesn’t mean your stable enough to maintain a relationship.  We have misguided ourselves to place ridiculous constraints on our heroes.

I am not a fan of the hero policy.  I don’t think I have yet to encounter anyone who qualifies as hero enough to be elevated to that rank. Maybe I’m overly cynical, but the folks in my life, past and present, have flaws. As humans we all have flaws, those flaws keep people out of the hero book.  Instead, I like to recognize both flaws and skills of an individual and determine which to avoid, which to emulate and which are tied together…..”Can I achieve his level of success without being an A-hole?”  As you know, sometimes it’s possible to separate success from flaws. Sometimes it isn’t.

I would like to tell you that I haven’t met anyone who has passed my rigorous tests to be a hero, which is why I never want to be the “Best”….this isn’t true .  Instead, I’ll admit that I really don’t like the ideal of a super focused hero type at all.

 

I like to attain a mix of skills….I have always known that I don’t have the raw skill, time or dedication to be the “Best” at anything.  So why try?  Instead I like to be passable at as many things as possible.  The Renaissance man ideal! 

There was a time when Leonardo da Vinci was held in high esteem for his achievements in multiple arts and sciences; perhaps the poster child of Renaissance man. However, the ideal is not really celebrated in today’s world and I think it’s missing.  We do celebrate those few among us the truly special who have personality and brains (Neil deGrasse Tyson) the outstanding athletes who have personality (Mark Hamilton, short list here had to pick someone). But I think it’s rare and under reported.  In America the only thing we like better than our celebrities, is the fantastic spectacle of watching them crash and burn (Lance Armstrong).

So I’m not the “Best” at anything.  I don’t want to be, I’m super ok with that, and you should be as well. I’m striving for a step better than mediocre but less than excellent.

Not sure I know anyone who is “The Best”, but then again I can do a few things better than most people.  I can out fish anyone I know, I can shoot straight.  But I can also cook, speak in public and do home repairs.  I can write (kinda), and do a few other things well enough to mention, but I haven’t hurt anyone, been in the news, or had a public melt down.  I exist in a happy unpopular mediocrity of balance.

 

 Times have changed and like the rest of nature we have evolved to be ever more specialized in life.  No longer are you a mechanic, but now you are a mechanic specializing in foreign cars, you don’t teach, but educate 4^th grade special education, you are not an engineer, but are now a water resource engineer specializing in water quality.  As our society demanded more specialization, we have evolved.However, the ultra-specialized are more susceptible to subtle changes in the environment.  Despite what you have seen on Looney Tunes, the likes of Wyle E. Coyote are far more successful in today’s world than those of the cougar.  Coyotes are excellent at adapting and are flexible, and so have flourished.

 The lesson is there and I think it’s worth keeping in mind.  Be good at what you do, but also be flexible, adapt, and be creative.

 I have yet to push my kids to be the “Best”.  I want them to experience enough of life and gather enough skills to be successful in their own right. I ask them to make good choices, take initiative and follow through: I want them to be able to take care of themselves, wherever they find themselves in the future. Experience will help you know where your strengths are, and were you excelled. Building a resume of varied experience will open doors not yet encountered, and help you change with our society. You never know when an old skill will prove useful.