Corrective Repeated Action Program (CRAP)

We can all look back, take a deep breath, and hold it; as we suck in our guts distended from the holiday season. Here we are in February, a month and change into the new year, and statistically speaking about 70 percent of you have already busted your New Year Resolution.  Not really your fault, New Year’s resolutions aren't any more effective than Congressional or even United Nations resolutions. A resolution is a resolution, it’s just that with the UN kind the Pentagon gets excited and bomb manufacturers get rich. Assuming your resolution hasn't caused death and destruction you can safely move on with a clear conscience or a healthy amount of guilt (depending on your religious hobbies). 

As for me, I have learned that the idea of a personal, date driven, resolution is doomed to fail. So I take a Corrective Repeated Action Program (CRAP), to clear my mind. If you need to know what a crap is please follow this link http://www.burningannie.com/features/shitlist.html. A CRAP, is of course different.  The last time I took a CRAP the intent was to become more comfortable in crowds.  It was before my trip to Disney and I was terrified of the prospect of 7 days in Florida heat with 1 million kids underfoot, 2 million parents with cameras for a total of 3 million people between me and where I wanted to be at any given moment. The CRAP involved putting myself in crowded situations and refraining from freaking out.  So I attended a few fairs, a fest, and the Rally to Restore Sanity in DC; packed on the mall with many thousands of folks. I didn't freak out and the experiences allowed me to enjoy my vacation a bit more. 

The first  CRAP of 2014 was substantial, I wanted to become a bit more trusting and patent of humans in general, especially those in my immediate local.  I choose to begin the CRAP while waiting in line at Wendy’s.  I firmly believe that Wendy’s is the slowest of the fast food burger joints, and here in New Mexico, a state famously hailed as the “Land of Mañana,” things are already slow.  I was in for a long simmer.  The few customers in the place were either employees on the break or old folks sipping their coffee, the place was empty more or less.  In front of me was an older couple, taking their time discussing the merits of the menu and ordering.  This delay would typically raise my blood pressure, but I had just started CRAP(ing) and was feeling the euphoric rush of pride typical with such an initiative.  

Eventually the folks ordered and worked themselves to the side of the counter where you wait for the food.  I ordered, and as I passed them on my way to the soda machine I overheard the man ask his wife, “Where do you want to sit?” “Oh, anywhere, just not in the sun,” she replied. The man walked past me and chose one of the twenty empty seats and waited for his wife.  I choose a seat in the middle of the place with the customary 1 table buffer from those around me, sat the soda down and returned to the counter for the food. 

Leaving the soda was a big deal, it was the first CRAP action.  Normally I wouldn't consider leaving food on the table. What might someone do to it? Would it be here when I returned?  Yes, I had those thoughts but banished them and reminded myself that people are generally good, and it was a 2 dollar soda, easily replaced.  The server engaged me in the conversation on living wage equality which made it harder to continue the CRAP, but I held tight and let it all flow through.  Just as I turned around, after receiving my food, I saw the old lady pick up my soda, move it two tables and set it down.  I was shocked, the first time leaving food on the table and travesty! Apparently, the man chose poorly, and the only other table in the empty restaurant that suited her, was that holding my soda.  Furthermore she knew it was mine and stared at me daring me to make a fuss as she moved it.  As if she new I had just started CRAPing and knew she could get away with it. 

That was the end of the CRAP, and I found it fairly unsatisfying, disturbingly short lived.  I hope that your almost inevitable lapse from your yearly resolution doesn't destroy your outlook on life. The rest of the year could be quite peachy keen for all.  As we work though the coming months our fates will unfold, until then, Best of Luck.